Hello, good afternoon I hope you’re well Brothers, it’s me Ayyaz Malik aka The Bearded Captain, Leader of all Beards, Flag Bearer of all Beards on digital and digital media. I am that Beard who tries to make people laugh and I am that Beard who tries to make people smile.

Bearded Kings, I hope you’re well. Your Captain really wishes you good wishes and that you are looking after yourselves. My Bearded Stallions, we need to talk about an issue that’s important to your Bearded Leader, staying warm!

As a Beard who has had two viral coughs and chest infections in the past two years, I maybe could offer my two cents. Oud perfume and my Ben Sherman perfume, badum .. two scents, get it? Forget it, will get my coat.

Which is necessary to this topic, keeping warm in the winter. Brothers, you need your coats and your face coats (your Beard). Also in the winter, you will need a kanbal, which I am sure I have butchered spelling-wise, I am sure of it.

This King’s is a blanket that’s so thick, I wonder if it’s 10 sheep skins sewn together and put in a blanket. Bearded Soldiers, to make it proper Asian, note you will not have the heating on when you’re in your home.

The heating is saved for parties. Come an hour before the party, you switch that bad boy and when it’s the time of the party, everyone is really warm. With the amount of people at an Asian party, why worry about putting the heat on?

From the amount of people present, the natural heat should aid with that. Also Brothers, the ‘Don Cloak’, well this is something which is worn for more outside.

We Asians don’t do snoods, the young pups do, but the real men, err no-no. Also, Brothers soup is one way an Asian get’s ready for the winter. This isn’t any soup, it’s a soup that’s mixed with chicken and syrup and served with bread soup.

What we Asians do, do is brew. I am a poet you didn’t know it? Nothing is more Asian like for getting ready for the winter by having a good warm cup of tea. PS, don’t be a biscuit dipper, have you not seen that viral TikTok?

My Bearded Beloved I leave you with this thought. It’s over and out from The Bearded Captain.

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