The xx debate (satire)

Hello and greetings my Bearded Soldiers, it’s me your Bearded Captain. Leader of all beards and flag bearer of all beards on digital broadcasting media.

I am that beard who tries to make people laugh and I am that beard who tries to make people smile. Brothers, I want to address this issue, the issue of the xx debate.

Now, I am not talking about a Vin Diesel movie here, I am in fact talking about the “kisses” debate at the end of messages. Now, this divides opinion amongst the masses, but brothers this won’t affect your masculinity if you send the odd x to one of the boys.

Now, most think errrr that’s “so gay” ( apologies here, not offence intended), but at the same time and yes I am going to say this …. as a hetrosexual male these very males will watch men and woman … Frankie Vaughan as they say.

If they were that concerned for their sexuality then, they would watch two women performers instead, but they don’t.

The xx 99% to me is a sign of trust and love, but not like love as in I love you, but I care for you and you mean something to me (that isn’t always sexual).

What I would say is that, if you don’t feel comfortable sending the odd xx to one of the boys, are they even one of the boys? If they get insecure and say “what the hell, why are you sending xx in the message?”

Brothers doubt the friendship. I have mentioned this before, it’s ok to be bromantic with the bros. Love hearts and xx are ok to send to the bros, the right bro will send you some back and add the one or two one top.

If this happens, know you have a bromie for life. I have to tell you a tale, the tale starts like this. Brothers, this is a tale of me adding someone on Linkedin (the posh Facebook).

Now, when I added this guy we got on very well and I thought we got on that well, I could just add a cheeky x to the message.

That indeed, proved to be my downfall as this guy was incensed and said “ I am not gay and I don’t see you that way”

Annoyed, I said look bro if I was that way inclined, one thing for sure I would get a better looking guy than you , and that was that.

So there you have it brothers. If anyone sends a love heart or xx they’re not trying to get in your pants.

Obviously if you’re husband and wife who send xx or love heart that is love. My brothers it’s over and out from The Bearded Captain.

Stay blessed, stay beard!


Published by ayyazmalik

Hi guys thanks for having a look at my blog :) . Just to state the obvious my name is Ayyaz Malik. I love writing articles, it's been a passion since I have been a 'wee nipper'. To share a little bit about myself I am training to be a cricket umpire (yay!) and I work for the Asian Sunday :) which is a up and coming paper in Bradford. is my way of sharing with you my view on sports world and world in general.

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