The “joys” of being a couple

Hello and good evening my Bearded brothers. My name is Ayyaz Malik, aka The Bearded Captain, leader of all beards on digital and broadcasting media.

I am that beard who tries to make people laugh and the beard that tries to make people smile. My bearded beloved’s I want to talk about an important issue.

This my brothers, is the issue of being in a relationship ( a couple). Now, for the benefit of this blog, I want to talk about a hetro-sexual relationship. Why? Well the women folk they’re a “lovely bunch”.

I think you can sense the sarcasm in my writing tone. The woman is always right notion is like the customer is always right theory, in both cases neither usually is.

But to keep the peace, in both circumstance you say ok to save the headache. Being in a couple? Well in winter it’s great … you get frozen to death at night, when you get the blanket snatched away from you.

You then try to wrestle back your rightful half of what’s yours, but when you tug … you’re met with 20 tonnes of resistance! Do you tug to wake them up or shiver it out?

If that’s bad what about the summer? You’re already 100 degrees, but she decides right I am sleeping on you today … you’re now realising what global warming feels like right at that moment! Lord all mighty.

In this case you open the window, but nope .. she’s cold so the window? Well that stays closed of course. Now, your partner you love them through thick and thin, but then comes the issue of sharing food.

It’s charitable to share, but my chicken burger?? Man! *sobs * I love the burger in its fully beauty. She always seems to eat the sweat spot. Yeah, I get very Joey Tribiani about food.

Drinks? Well you usually get left with the bottom part of the glass, the scraping of the barrel stuff. No, no not the delicious part of the orange juice for example.

If that’s not enough, then you get the Jo-Jo (female equivalent of tomtom). No you’re right and not a GPS satellite that knows the routes via that info.

Last but not least, if you have your things set one way, most likely she will set them her way, clash of egos and personalities nightmare!

Ok, that’s enough couple bashing hahaha. I mean, I write this from the man’s perspective I am sure stuff like the toilet seat being left up must drive ladies crazy.

There are perks of being in a couple. The sharing of food, it makes your food taste that much better. The sharing of a bed, you sleep that much better next to that special person.

You know the boys will support you, but your woman will support you and help you grow. They’re the backbone of the relationship. The right woman, helps you clear your mind and get your *sh*t* in order.

We can moan about the woman all we want, but you get a good one in your life? There’s nothing better.

It’s over and out from The Bearded Captain, stay blessed stay beard!

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